Fight the :Empty: [Words]

There once lived a girl in a nowhere town that changed from time to time. These are the words that crossed her mind, the ones she meant.

Weighted

This is the iron pressed cold on my shoulders,

not tang in my mouth.

Fearless, thoughtless, a caress too casual to be real, to firm to be denied.

How do I learn to let go?

when everything has already left.

Smell of the Rain

Oh how I wish. 

But I don’t know how to be something 

you miss.

Shrug

I shrug at the winds of the where of the why. 

They weigh too heavily on this anchor mine.

They ache and pull and climb

And I feel them rattle a groan through my spine.

This is the burden I bear tonight

and every night

since I arrived too far from you.

Too far from me.

Privacy

You thought I wanted my privacy. 

And I did. 

But not from you. Never from you.

Bump A Shoulder While You Can

I don’t like being so far away from my friends. I miss being able to:

look them in the eye,

hugs and shoves,

mad ravings late at night,

baking things for them,

distracting them from their problems,

providing a stress-free zone,

laughing,

trips to Walmart,

pillow fights,

singing to musicals (with hand motions),

singing to Disney movies,

picking up each other’s habits,

correct their grammar,

generally being a playful nuisance,

love them from two feet away.

The Constant Knock

There is a knock at the door that is no door to the place I once was, and it shakes the walls of me.

That is the loneliness talking. Not a sharp pain. Or a knife in the heart.

Just a knock. A constant, rhythmless, knock. 

And a reminder, that there used to be a door.

A Part of Me Has Died

People are always telling you that change is a good thing. But all they’re really saying is that something you didn’t want to happen at all, has happened. I graduated today. I’m a college student, did I ever tell you that? It’s a lovely school, and in a week I will be somewhere really depressing, like a big city. Soon, it’ll just be a memory. In fact, someone, some foolish person, will probably thing it’s a tribute to growth, the way life keeps changing on your, the way you can never count on it, or something. I know because that’s the sort of thing I’m always saying. But the truth is…I’m heartbroken. I feel as if a part of me has died, and my refuge has died all over again, and no one can ever make it right.

I Am Not Moving On

handfulsofworld:

I will love you long after you’re gone.

Wherever There May Be

I will be with you. You ask me to go, and I will stay with you. I will go there with you. I will go wherever There may be.

Balance of My Few

There are rules unspoken and silent and strong.

And when you break them, I must wonder at the choice you have brought to me.

I either suffer them to be lashed.

Or set you to flames myself.

It hurts my heart to see you misunderstand.

You are not the only one I would bleed for.